first ones I recommend. So maybe don't do that, or start with a bit of that but then switch, because it'll take really long for your partner to come, if they even can. Honestly, it becomes hard to tell if you are or aren't; additionally, this Tucker Max story was not helpful for my butt sex-phobia. Also, dont stick the nozzle all the way in theres no need to, and you can hurt yourself if youre not gentle enough. (Being one or two orgasms deep before you try any anal penetration helps.) "The more aroused you are, the more relaxed your sphincter muscle will be, and that's going to make for a hotter and easier experience she says. In fact, most of your sex life wont resemble porn because porn isnt reality. Some people recommend taking a deep breath when your sexual partner first enters you. Training your mind and body to not clench to relax, to trust the person youre playing with, and to feel pleasure is the most awesome part of the journey. You dont need much. If youre having sex, you should get a full-range STI test every three months, minimum. Don't stress over. Squeeze their finger with your butt, hold the squeeze for a few seconds, and then relax.